“Bubba I love you so much!” I say to the young woman sitting in the driver’s seat.
“Aw Bub. I love you too.”
“Bubba you know those moments when you just have to say ‘I love you.’ Because the feeling is …just overwhelming you?”
“Yeah Bubba I do.”
I have always thought that saying the person’s name at the beginning of the statement adds more. Just more. With Bubba I have to add everything I have.
That was the end. She knew that I was implying that moment was one of those brimming with elated emotions. The airport was behind us and the entire weekend in front. The freeway matched the sky giving the sense we were driving in a gray cloud. Only the green trees, filled with life, shattered the illusion.
“Bubba could you find a song on my ipod?” She said
She disliked moving her hands from 10 and 2.
“It’s called ‘A Song for Zula’” She continued.
It was a love song and it was beautiful. The voice was raspy and filled with emotion. We sat and listened. We were together again, and at that moment not thinking of anything else.
“I wish we were sitting in front of a campfire right now.” He said to me through the computer screen.
Skype is unforgiving. It forces you to look straight into the eyes of the person you’re talking to. Every nuance seen. Lying is impossible.
“Why?” I asked.
“It wouldn’t be so difficult to say all the hard things.”
“Oh. I say all the hard stuff in the car. You don’t have to look at the other person when you’re driving. “
You just focus on the dark black asphalt with the yellow and white stripes until your courage appears.
“Yeah, same concept.” He said.
It was. It simply displayed our two opposite lifestyles. He’s used to the warm yellow embers with the stars above and dirt below. Time moves slower for him. He is able to appreciate better.
My life is filled with colorful blurs. They are vibrant, but the detail seems to disappear in the city.
“Taylor, Tony said that you’re almost as awkward as me!”
This is how my sister begins our telephone conversation. I can tell she is grinning a huge grin in Boston.
I think it’s a compliment. We have always been proud of our awkwardness in a weird way.
“Yeah! He said ‘Taylor’s pretty awkward too. But not as awkward as you, Hannah.’”
I laughed. So my twin sister has won. She does say whatever is on her mind. I have always admired this trait, that I simply do not have.
Silence has taken over the space between the phone.
“It’s a good thing Taylor! It just means we’re real… like Jennifer Lawrence. She is my idol!”
“I know. I know.”
And with that we continue our conversation. It mostly consists of a hard deep laugh that we both share. We sound the same. We look similar. We know each other all to well. Distance could never change that.